Is your team stuck in a place where the effectiveness isn’t where you’d like it to be, or maybe you’re getting a lot of things done, but it just feels harder than it should? I’d like to share an exercise I use with teams to help them reset and get a sense of what’s working, what’s not, and where to go from here.
You have a couple of options for doing this team effectiveness exercise. One, do it yourself. Watch the video, pause when prompted, and write down your own insights as you go. Or, two, share and use this video in a team meeting and do the exercises together. Or, you could try it on your own first and then share it with your team. Either way, I’m going to ask you to have a paper and pencil handy. I’ll give instructions for each step, ask you to complete the exercise, and then we’ll resume with the next set of instructions.
Ready? Great. Grab a piece of paper and a pencil and let’s get started!
Step 1: Think About How Your Team Got Here
In step one, I want you to reflect on how your team arrived at its current state. Consider questions like:
- How did we reach this state of either dysfunction or malaise or some version of ‘this is not where we want it to be’?
- What happened? What situations brought us to this point?
- What events or decisions occurred along the way that led us here?
- Who was involved? Who did what?
Take some time to write down a narrative detailing the journey that brought your team to its current position. Really tell the story of how your team got to where you are today.
Step 2: Think About How Your Team Will Get Out of Here
Moving on to step two, I want you to think about how we can navigate our way out of this situation if we find ourselves stuck. Either the team isn’t doing what it needs to do, is failing to fulfill its responsibilities and letting others down, or simply encountering more obstacles than necessary, making it harder than it needs to be. Write down what you think it’s going to take to overcome these challenges and make it better. What measures could help us get back on track, become more productive again, and potentially improve our overall morale, and make it feel a little better?
In essence, the second question is: What is it going to take to make your team the kind of high-performing team that you deserve to be a part of?
Now, write down the answer to that question, and then move on to step three.
Step 3: Reflect on Your First Answer
The first thing I want you to do in step three is to look at your answer in step one. It may contain lots of details, but I’m less interested in specifics and more interested in a couple of words:
- How often do you see the word “I” or “me”?
- Also, how often do you see the word ‘they’ or ‘you’ or somebody else’s name?
When you tell yourself the story of how your team arrived at its current challenge, consider who emerges as the antagonist in that narrative. Is it you? Is your paragraph full of situations where you assume responsibility, using phrases like “I did this” or “I didn’t do that”? Are you taking ownership and accountability?
Or, is your paragraph full of “They did this,” and, “They did that”? One of my clients used to refer to this as their corporate salute because blame was so much a part of their culture before we got started.
This is step three.
Now, take a second to circle the I’s, the we’s, and the they’s. Just get a sense of how much of the story you’re telling yourself about how you got to where you are is one where you feature prominently versus somebody else featuring prominently.
Step 4: Look at the Second Paragraph
Examine the second paragraph you wrote and ask the same question as in step three:
- Is it predominantly filled with instances of I and me? Or is it full of phrases like “until the boss changes this,” or, “until this person leaves”?
- Is it a story where you are a key part, an active participant in making your team healthier and better? Or is it a story where you’re passively waiting for everyone else to change things?
This is really important because we, as humans, are storytellers. We make sense of our world by creating stories and narratives about what we believe is true. And these stories shape our beliefs, influence our actions, and guide our behaviors. If you’ve decided that this is everyone else’s fault, it’s much less likely that you’re going to do the things to make it better— to take proactive steps toward improvement.
Write down your answers to these questions and in your first paragraph consider how much responsibility you took for the current situation versus how much you attributed blame to others. In your second paragraph, reflect on whether you perceived yourself as part of the solution or if you were waiting for everyone else to fix it.
This leads us to step five.
Step 5: Think About Four Possibilities
I want you to think about four different possibilities that arise from this.
Possibility 1: You’re a Spectator to Your Team’s Dysfunction
You might have concluded, “I wasn’t part of the problem, and I’m not going to be part of the solution. I’m just a spectator to all of this.” However, being a spectator to your own team’s dysfunction is disheartening because you do possess agency and you do have an opportunity to enact positive change. If you find yourself just sitting on a runaway train waiting to go off the cliff, or watching as your team heads toward disaster, it’s a bleak situation.
I want you to reflect on this. In the next step, I’m going to ask you to figure out how to move out of that box or break out of that mindset because being that passive spectator or sitting in that victim box is not somewhere you want to be.
Possibility 2: You’re a Villain in Your Own Story
Here’s another scenario to consider: You recognized yourself as part of the problem but not as part of the solution. You were prominently featured in paragraph one but absent in paragraph two. Essentially, you’ve cast yourself as the villain in your own story. That’s interesting, and kudos to you for owning up to your role in what’s not working. But it’s also a missed opportunity if you fail to recognize how you can make it better, and contribute to improvement.
Perhaps you honestly feel like you’ve dug yourself in too deep a hole to climb out of. If that’s the case, feel free to share your situation in the comments. I’ll try to provide specific advice that might be helpful for you in the circumstances you’re in. It’s truly unfortunate if you’ve painted yourself as the villain of your own story.
Possibility 3: You’re the Superhero Saving the Day
The other possibility is that you don’t feel that you were part of creating the problem, but you do see yourself as crucial to resolving it. This stance may seem reasonable if you weren’t a big part of creating the problem, but there’s a risk involved. The risk lies in being naive or lacking self-awareness about your contributions to the problem. Rushing in to play the superhero without fully understanding the situation may lead to resentment from others who might question your motives or see you as trying to take center stage in resolving the issue.
So I don’t want you being the hero or the savior where you only think you’re part of the solution, and don’t see how you were also part of getting to the situation you’re in today.
If you find yourself in that position, I recommend acknowledging your role in reaching that point, even if it’s as simple as admitting, “I should have spoken up earlier.” This demonstrates accountability and recognizes your contribution to the situation. It’s important not to focus on being the hero or savior where you only think you’re part of the solution, without recognizing how you were part of the problem that led to the situation you’re in today.
Possibility 4: You’re One of the Uncommon Few Who Understand
What I genuinely hope for is that you reach a point where you recognize both your contribution to the problem and your potential to be part of the solution. This is possibility four.
In all my experiences with this exercise, I’ve only ever had one person who got to this point the first time around, because it’s just really not that common. We, as humans, fall victim to what’s called the fundamental attribution error. If things go wrong for us, we attribute it to the situation rather than ourselves. Conversely, if things go wrong for other people, we often perceive it as a flaw inherent to them. So, it’s not surprising that we haven’t had many people arrive at this realization initially. However, what we’re aiming for is to reach a point where you understand your role in how the team got to where it is, while also recognizing the huge opportunity to change how you behave and improve team dynamics.
Step 6: Redo Your Answers
This brings us to the last step, step six. In this stage, I encourage you to redo your answers, especially to section two. If you have time or you think it’s important, address both section one and two, but alter your responses to question two to ensure everyone understands, “Here’s what we’re going to do differently.” And I want you to have your revised version of the second answer full of statements that start with, “I will,” “I will do this,” or, “I won’t do this.”
These are strong statements, not wishful thinking like “I hope this happens,” or, “I might,” or, “I’ll try.” Those phrases lack conviction and are weak declarations to put in your commitment. So, fill that second paragraph now with “I will” statements.
Step 7: Share Step 6 Only
This exercise is among my favorites. I know it may be somewhat uncomfortable because chances are that you didn’t use a lot of ‘I’ and ‘me’ in your first paragraphs, and it can be hard to admit that, which leads me to one other caveat.
I don’t think you have to share your paragraphs from the first four or five steps out loud with anyone. Simply reading and reflecting on them is enough—let it soak in. The only step I encourage you to share with everyone else is step six. What’s your commitment? Where did you get to by the end of this exercise?
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I hope this exercise gives you as much insight as it does for my clients. If you have any questions, feel free to reach out. I’m happy to help. It’s such an important method to help understand the story you’re telling yourself about your team and to craft a new one that’s going to help you earn the team that you deserve.
Do you want to find out about more team issues? Check out how to be a good team player!
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